June 17th, 2018 I originally wrote the following 3 years ago, a month and half from Ellie’s 1st birthday. On this Father’s Day, my heart is heavy for a multitude of reasons. Reading and seeing the separation of fathers from their children across this country and around the world is devastating. The wounds from my … More Entry #6
June 14th, 2018 Two weeks today, I got the phone call my dad was found dead. Since that time I was able to spend time with my sister, her husband, and my dad’s three sisters. Memories were made and old ones discovered. Grief and loss are odd companions on this journey. They are cruel and … More Entry #5
June 12th, 2018 There is a tension building within me. It is encouraging to hear from others that I will never be my father. But, the facts remains, that I do resemble him in many ways. Growing up, I had always been compared to my mother, in character and looks throughout my life. When we … More Entry #4
June 7th, 2018 When I was in elementary school, I ran away from home. I packed an old suitcase with a yearbook from when my mom worked at a nearby college and nothing more. I didn’t pack any toys or clothes, because I told my young self that I was going to start new and … More Entry #3
June 5th, 2018 It finally happened. Last night, Jenny(my wife) gave me a gift that finally caused me to cry and sob. I jokingly told her the week before that I did not have a stuffed animal to cuddle with. She gave me this teddy and upon receiving it, I was reminded of one of … More Entry #2
June 3rd, 2018 8 years ago, I got a strange phone call from my estranged father. His mother was on her final breaths and all of his sisters flew down to be by her side. He made a request that haunts me to this day. I had known that she had suffered a critical stroke … More Entry #1
On Thursday, May 31st, 2018, I received the news that no child should get. My father was found dead. I have not spoken to him since last summer. He had encountered a stroke and because of his suspended license, he needed a ride back home from the hospital. I told him I would be happy … More Introduction to My Grieving Journal.